My teacher says to me, "Don't wait. Go!" He says this to me because I'm standing at the front end of my mat, my hands pressed on the floor a foot in front of my feet, my eyes gazing at a specific, unnameable spot between my hands, and I'm hanging out in the anticipatory moment as if there is no other option. One is supposed to exhale out of Utkatasana, plant the hands, inhale up to handstand, hold it there, exhale down to Chaturanga, and carry on one's merry way through the rest of the practice. But I pause and sit in the anticipation. I can do handstand. And yet I wait. And I worry that...what? That I will handstand myself all the way over into a backbend? So what? That I will handstand myself up to the moon? It's a reasonable fear. One never knows one's strength.
Usually, when my teacher comes over to spot me, I can jump right up. I trust him.
Perhaps I do not trust myself.
Maybe you are a handstand-lover that just enjoys savoring the moment. ;)
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