How Can I Make More Space?

I recently asked my wonderful teacher Luke Jordan what I was doing wrong in Baddha Konasana. By "wrong," I meant, why can't I get my chin to the floor?

He floated over (Luke floats while he teaches...it's amazing) and showed me just how open the hips can be. He sat in Baddha Konasana, turned the soles of his feet completely upward and drew his heels completely inward, and proceeded to fold forward while I looked on in amazement.

And then he said this, and I am paraphrasing here: "I try to think less about the right way of doing it, and more like, 'How can I open more space?'"

Open more space...he sends this message often. He urges us not to get overly attached to correctness, and rather toward freeing the corners of the body, and of the mind.

It's the heartbeat of the practice, I think.

And so this is where my mind is during asana these days. I come to the pose, and I ask, "How can I open more space?" in the hip, the shoulder, the neck, the sole of the foot, the hands...the spaces between my fingers. And I find it.

Today, he folded me into Baddha Konasana, nose to the floor, and just when I thought I had reached my folding point, there was release in the upper back, and then relaxation. Relaxation! Unbelievable.

Lots of lessons in this idea, of course, and the flow into life off the mat is lovely. My mentor said to me last night that it helps her in her relationship to ask herself, "Am I taking the easy way out or the hard way out?" The latter, of course, is the greatest challenge. What is found in getting over ourselves, however, is opened space. An argument with a partner or child can tempt us to dig in our heels in stubbornness. But, as my other teacher, David Garrigues, has explained, it is so beautifully important just to be able to see that there is another way to feel. Not to negate, just to open sight. To take the hard route—to admit another person is right, to reach out a hand even though you're about to fall asleep angry, to hold a child who has just disobeyed you—is about opening space around a very stuck place in the heart and mind. It kneads the knot there. It creates possibility for anxiety or frustration to take a turn toward something lighter, more peaceful.

Opening space can be about folding forward in Baddha Konasana. The bliss and awe of seeing the hips open like that (without any post-practice soreness, by the way) is stunning on its own. But it is more, for our emotional blocks are like stiffness in the joints. And peace is much more accessible than we might think it is.